you played well

losing close one hurts,
it's painful.
we try to rewind, we pray for them to come back,
we relive bygone days,
and drain ourselves into heaviness.

but after months or years,
we still remember them,
we remember them with fondness,
and I think that's how we should cherish our close people.

though not together,
I still miss you,
your laughs, your punchlines,
our conversations: though short, sometimes unanswered,
but I will read those, again and again, to keep you here.

Wherever you are,
I pray and hope,
you are in a better place.
I fail to keep promises, and I hope you forgive me.